Guide to Document a Parent with Substance Abuse Issues During a New Jersey Divorce

Substance abuse is a relatively commonplace issue during New Jersey divorce proceedings. If you are involved in a divorce with children and you have a spouse who appears to have a substance abuse issue, there are some specific guidelines to consider to document the situation in an effective manner.

Keep a Detailed Journal

• Maintain a daily log of incidents related to the parent's substance abuse.
• Record dates, times, and specific behaviors observed.
• Note any impact on the children, including missed appointments, school events, or visitations.
• Document any conversations or admissions about substance use.

Gather Evidence

• Collect any physical evidence of substance abuse (e.g., empty bottles, drug paraphernalia).
• Take photographs or videos of concerning behavior, if safe to do so.
• Save text messages, emails, or social media posts that indicate substance abuse.
• Keep records of financial transactions related to substance purchases.

Medical Records

• Obtain copies of relevant medical records, with proper authorization.
• Document any hospitalizations, emergency room visits, or treatments related to substance abuse.
• Keep track of prescribed medications and their usage during a New Jersey divorce.

Legal Documentation

• Record any arrests, DUIs, or legal issues related to substance abuse.
• Obtain police reports if applicable.
• Document any violations of existing court orders or custody agreements.

Witness Statements

• Gather written statements from witnesses who have observed the substance abuse or its effects.
• Include statements from family members, friends, neighbors, or childcare providers.
• Ensure statements are dated and signed.

Professional Evaluations

• Seek evaluations from substance abuse counselors or addiction specialists.
• Request reports from therapists or counselors working with the children.
• Consider obtaining a custody evaluation from a court-appointed expert.

Impact on Children

• Document any changes in the children's behavior, academic performance, or emotional well-being.
• Keep records of therapy sessions or counseling for the children.
• Note any concerns expressed by teachers, coaches, or other adults in the children's lives.

Financial Records

• Document any financial instability or mismanagement related to substance abuse.
• Keep records of unpaid bills, job losses, or depleted savings.
• Track any money spent on substances instead of family necessities.

Treatment History

• Document any attempts at rehabilitation or treatment programs.
• Record attendance at support group meetings (e.g., AA, NA).
• Note any relapses or discontinued treatments.

Communication Records

• Save voicemails, text messages, or emails that demonstrate erratic behavior or substance abuse.
• Document missed communications or inconsistent contact with children.

Employment Records

• Keep track of job performance issues, absences, or terminations related to substance abuse during a New Jersey divorce.
• Document any workplace incidents or disciplinary actions.

Safe Storage

• Keep all documentation in a secure, private location.
• Consider using a password-protected digital storage system for electronic records.
• Make backup copies of all important documents.

Consult Professionals

• Work closely with your divorce attorney to ensure proper documentation.
• Consider consulting a family therapist for guidance on protecting the children's well-being.
• Seek advice from a substance abuse specialist on documenting addiction-related behaviors.

Focus on Facts

• Stick to objective observations and avoid emotional language in your documentation.
• Be specific and detailed in your records.
• Avoid making assumptions or diagnoses; focus on observable behaviors.

Consistency is Key

• Maintain regular, consistent documentation during a New Jersey divorce.
• Update your records promptly after incidents occur.
• Establish a routine for reviewing and organizing your documentation.

Child Safety Plan

• Document any safety measures implemented to protect the children.
• Keep records of any emergency contacts or procedures established.
• Note any instances where the safety plan was necessary.

Collaborative Documentation

• Work with other caregivers or family members to maintain consistent records.
• Ensure all parties involved in documentation understand legal and ethical boundaries.

Ongoing Assessment

• Regularly review your documentation to identify patterns or escalating behaviors.
• Be prepared to adjust your documentation strategy as circumstances change.

Legal Compliance

• Ensure all documentation methods comply with local laws and regulations.
• Avoid any actions that could be construed as harassment or invasion of privacy.

Self-Care

• While documenting, don't neglect your own mental health and well-being.
• Seek support from therapists or support groups for individuals dealing with a spouse's addiction.
• Remember, the goal of documentation is to provide a clear, factual record that supports the best interests of the children. Always prioritize the safety and well-being of yourself and your children throughout this process.

If you need to talk to an attorney about a parent with substance abuse and a New Jersey divorce, call the Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen, at (201) 845-7400 for a free consultation.

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