Understanding the Emotional Toll of Property Division in Divorce

Property division in divorce represents what often proves to be the most challenging and even emotionally taxing elements of a New Jersey marriage dissolution proceeding. There are a number of ways in which property division in divorce can and does take an emotional toll. Understanding some ways in which the property and debt division process might take a toll allows a party to a divorce to be more proactive in taking steps to try and contain an emotional response to this element of ending a marriage.

The act of dividing property in a divorce often triggers significant emotional stress. This stress primarily arises from the necessity of letting go of items that hold sentimental value. These items could be tangible reminders of shared experiences, carrying memories, or symbolizing specific stages or moments in the relationship. The emotional connection to these items can make them particularly hard to part with, adding another layer of emotional turmoil to the separation process.

The process of property division in a divorce can stir up dormant memories and emotions. These could be memories associated with the shared properties or the relationship itself. The resurgence of these emotions, which are often painful, complicated, or difficult to deal with, can add another layer of complexity to the already challenging divorce proceedings. This can make the divorce process more emotionally draining and prolong the healing process.

The negotiation process over who gets what property can lead to heightened tension and conflict between the divorcing parties. This conflict can stem from differing views on the value of properties, the emotional attachment to certain items, or perceived fairness of the division. The emotional stakes in these negotiations can exacerbate existing disagreements or grievances, potentially leading to more heated and protracted disputes.

The emotional toll of valuing shared properties and assets can be heavy, especially if one party feels they are getting less than their fair share. This feeling might not only be about the financial value but also about the emotional value attached to these shared properties. The perceived inequality in the distribution can lead to feelings of resentment or injustice, adding to the emotional burden of divorce.

The division of property has the potential to make the finality of the divorce feel more real and tangible. This realization can lead to feelings of sadness or grief as the individuals come to terms with the end of their marital relationship and the dissolution of the shared life they once had. The physical separation of shared assets can be a painful reminder of the lost relationship, potentially intensifying feelings of loss and grief.

The process also has the potential to cause worry and uncertainty about the future, particularly in terms of financial stability. The division of property often means a reduction in assets for both parties, leading to concerns about maintaining the same lifestyle or meeting financial obligations post-divorce. The fear of financial instability can add to the emotional stress of the divorce, making it harder to focus on healing and moving forward.

Finally, the process can be especially hard if there are children involved, as decisions about the family home may impact them. A family home often holds emotional significance for everyone, and its loss can affect the children's sense of security and stability. The need to protect their interests while dealing with personal emotional turmoil adds an additional layer of stress to the process. This balancing act between personal emotions and the well-being of the children can make the divorce process even more emotionally challenging.

Keep in mind that it is preferable to attempt to keep emotions reasonably under control during New Jersey divorce proceedings. Generally speaking, we all make better decisions when we are not in a state in which emotions are “wound up.” This certainly is the case when faced with making decisions during a marital dissolution case. If you have any questions concerning a NJ divorce, call (201) 845-7400 for a free consultation.